I love the way you smile
how you taste like cigarettes
But I'm growing rather tired
of your ambivalence

~ 10/22/03 ~

corpulent crimson moon
bleeding down into your room
burning, burning, burning
just like god's eye

summer fades & winter grows
still she's dancing in those clothes
burning, burning, burning
down the hollows

"The city, she welcomes you!" the sign says
So why do I feel so unwelcome?
I don't feel anything akin to an invitation
I'm getting used to closing my eyes on that feeling of unease
I'm trying so hard to reach you
Maybe I'm trying too hard down here on my knees
This is what it's like to be unwanted

I'm tired of feeling inadequate
my disappointment deepens
as I contemplate the culmination
of our tumultuous tryst
you stand beside the obvious
pretend to be oblivious
while I struggle not to choke
on my kind words & your secret smile

The Cold

the cold penetrates the walls with icy fingers
hands like Death slowly carress bone deep aching
breath frozen thin and broken
while frost tangles in your hair
thought is caught in the brambles
waiting silent in sterile light

~ 12/18/03 ~